3 tips for being a good encourager
Everybody needs encouragement. So how can you be a good encourager? How can you help a person to become the best kind of artist, engineer, teacher or whatever they want to be? How can you discover what gives them energy? How can you help them to excel? Good encouragers are like good educators. They focus on the three E’s: encouragement, enterprise and excellence. Let’s explore how you can follow these steps when helping another person.
* You can focus on encouragement.
Encouragement often starts on a basic level. The first stage calls for providing people with practical support, such as the materials for life -food, shelter and the ability to shape their future. The second stage calls for offering people psychological support. So how can you provide individuals with such encouragement?
Try tackling the exercise on this theme called My encouragers. This invites you to do three things. First, looking back on your life, write the names of 3 people who have encouraged you. For example, a parent, teacher, sports coach, manager, friend, writer, artist or whoever. Second, describe what they did right to be good encouragers. For example, they may have made you feel the centre of the world, identified your talents and, when necessary, given tough messages. Third, bearing these principles in mind, describe how you can encourage other people. Everybody is different, of course, so it is obviously important to check with them how they want to be encouraged.
* You can focus on enterprise.
Good encouragers are like good educators. Looking at a person, they ask themselves: “When does the person ‘come alive’? When do they take initiatives? What are the activities in which they are ‘in their element’? When do they show a sense of enterprise?” George Lyward, a pioneer in child care, used to say: "You have to look for what Antoine St. Exupery called 'The Murdered Mozart' in each person. Look for the golden moments when they become fascinated by an activity. A person may be painting, playing football or whatever. Help them to discover what they are doing right. Help them to find and follow their natural discipline. They can then create more of those golden moments. Help the person to become the best kind of Mozart they can be."
* You can focus on excellence.
Good educators build on a person’s positive energy and help them to achieve excellence. They agree with the person on: a) The goals they want to achieve: b) The person’s role in achieving the goals: c) The help they want from the educator. They then work together to enable the person to achieve excellence. If appropriate, you can follow similar principles to help somebody to reach their goals. Certainly this works well if you are in a professional relationship, such as acting as a manager, mentor or coach. Personal relationships have a different dynamic - and it is important not to automatically move into a ‘coaching role’. There is nothing more annoying than somebody who tries to fix everybody else’s life! Sometimes it can be appropriate, however, to encourage a person along their road towards achieving excellence. Encouragers are on the side of life. They keep planting seeds of hope and we never forget a good encourager.
Encouragement often starts on a basic level. The first stage calls for providing people with practical support, such as the materials for life -food, shelter and the ability to shape their future. The second stage calls for offering people psychological support. So how can you provide individuals with such encouragement?
Try tackling the exercise on this theme called My encouragers. This invites you to do three things. First, looking back on your life, write the names of 3 people who have encouraged you. For example, a parent, teacher, sports coach, manager, friend, writer, artist or whoever. Second, describe what they did right to be good encouragers. For example, they may have made you feel the centre of the world, identified your talents and, when necessary, given tough messages. Third, bearing these principles in mind, describe how you can encourage other people. Everybody is different, of course, so it is obviously important to check with them how they want to be encouraged.
* You can focus on enterprise.
Good encouragers are like good educators. Looking at a person, they ask themselves: “When does the person ‘come alive’? When do they take initiatives? What are the activities in which they are ‘in their element’? When do they show a sense of enterprise?” George Lyward, a pioneer in child care, used to say: "You have to look for what Antoine St. Exupery called 'The Murdered Mozart' in each person. Look for the golden moments when they become fascinated by an activity. A person may be painting, playing football or whatever. Help them to discover what they are doing right. Help them to find and follow their natural discipline. They can then create more of those golden moments. Help the person to become the best kind of Mozart they can be."
* You can focus on excellence.
Good educators build on a person’s positive energy and help them to achieve excellence. They agree with the person on: a) The goals they want to achieve: b) The person’s role in achieving the goals: c) The help they want from the educator. They then work together to enable the person to achieve excellence. If appropriate, you can follow similar principles to help somebody to reach their goals. Certainly this works well if you are in a professional relationship, such as acting as a manager, mentor or coach. Personal relationships have a different dynamic - and it is important not to automatically move into a ‘coaching role’. There is nothing more annoying than somebody who tries to fix everybody else’s life! Sometimes it can be appropriate, however, to encourage a person along their road towards achieving excellence. Encouragers are on the side of life. They keep planting seeds of hope and we never forget a good encourager.
You can find many more ideas on this them in the book Strengths Coaching in 90 Minutes, which can be found here:
Labels: encouragement
posted by Mike Pegg at
19:47
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